ESP(N)

I'll start by saying this: I like ESPN. I watch ESPN. Wilbon is a guy I'd like to have a beer with and if I ever see Chris Broussard in person, I'll give him a windmill high-five. But I'm not so sure these guys are great at prognosticating how the NBA Playoffs will unfold. It's surely not an easy job and I'd probably fall on my face if I tried doing the same.

But with 83% of the first round of the 2011 NBA Playoffs over, I had a thought. Which expert predicted the outcomes best? I'll go through each one and award points for each prediction: 1 if you get the winner right, with a bonus 3 if you predict the number of games correctly. (This makes four points total, which I chose since a team wins one of four ways, e.g. 4, 5, 6, 7 games.) Here we go.

Correct winners in blue, correct winners and number of games are in red.

EASTERN CONFERENCE:

Chicago Bulls vs. Indiana Pacers

A strong start here. Everyone picked the winner correctly. Three bonus points for Michael Wilbon, Tim Legler, Hollingerbot-5000, Chad Ford, Chris Broussard, JA Adande, and whoever this Friedell kid is. It looks like every team has a hometown blogger/writer picking the series, so we'll count them aggregately.

Wilbon - 4
Legler - 4
Hollingerbot - 4
Ford - 4
Broussard - 4
JA Adande - 4
Local Writer - 4
Thorpe - 1
Sheridan - 1
Stein - 1
Arnovitz - 1
Abbott - 1

Miami Heat vs. Philadelphia 76ers


Wow. Another strong showing by the ESPN knuckleheads. 9 of 12 predicted the series exactly. Let's add that to the totals.

Wilbon - 8
Legler - 8
Hollingerbot - 8
Ford - 8
Broussard - 8
Local Writer - 8
JA Adande - 5
Thorpe - 5
Stein - 5
Arnovitz - 5
Sheridan - 2
Abbott - 2

Boston Celtics vs. New York Knicks

Good news/bad news here. Everyone picked the Celtics, but nobody picked the sweep. Everyone gets a point.

Wilbon - 9
Legler - 9
Hollingerbot - 9
Ford - 9
Broussard - 9
Local Writer - 9
JA Adande - 6
Thorpe - 6
Stein - 6
Arnovitz - 6
Sheridan - 3
Abbott - 3

Orlando Magic vs. Atlanta Hawks

OOPS. Atlanta won this series in a tidy 6 games. Nobody picked them to win 4 in seven tries, much less six. We award you no points, and my God have mercy on your souls.


WESTERN CONFERENCE

San Antonio Spurs vs. Memphis Grizzlies

Now, this is the only series that actually hasn't been decided yet, but for our purposes, it doesn't matter. If the Grizzlies win the series, everyone would be wrong. If the Spurs win the series, they have to do it in 7 games, which nobody predicted (yet everyone would get one point). So it's a complete wash, and we'll just move on... (Note that Brent Barry makes his first appearance here.)

Los Angeles Lakers vs. New Orleans Hornets

Another wash. Everyone predicted the Lakers' series win correctly, but nobody saw CP3 coming and somehow pulling off two wins for his squad. Everyone gets one meager point, so we'll update the totals. (Brent Barry filling in for Arnovitz.)

Wilbon - 10
Legler - 10
Hollingerbot - 10
Ford - 10
Broussard - 10
Local Writer - 10
JA Adande - 7
Thorpe - 7
Stein - 7
Arnovitz - 6
Sheridan - 4
Abbott - 4
Barry - 1

Dallas Mavericks vs. Portland Trailblazers

Finally a split decision. Two hit the nail on the head, four picked the right winner. This just might decide who the best predictor really is.

Thorpe - 11
Broussard - 11
Wilbon - 10
Legler - 10
Hollingerbot - 10
Ford - 10
Local Writer - 10
Stein - 8
JA Adande - 8
Arnovitz - 6
Abbott - 5
Sheridan - 4
Barry - 5

Oklahoma City Thunder vs. Denver Nuggets

Lots of people picking the Thunder here, but nobody guessing they pull off the series in five games. Award 1 point to everybody but SteinyMo and Henry Abbott.

Thorpe - 12
Broussard - 12
Wilbon - 11
Legler - 11
Hollingerbot - 11
Ford - 11
Local Writer - 10 (in six attempts)
JA Adande - 9
Stein - 8
Arnovitz - 7 (in six attempts)
Abbott - 5
Sheridan - 5
Barry - 6 (in four attempts)

So what does all of this mean? Out of 32 possible points, the highest anyone could get was 12. Now I realize if anyone got anywhere close to 32 they should be a professional sports gambler for a living and not an ESPN analyst. But what it means is that the experts are wrong. So very wrong, so very often. And with that as your final thought... I'll leave you with this:

"that's the way baseball go"

whatever you're going to be for Halloween, don't. because you've already lost to this little guy

San Francisco Libbies deny green self in effort to mess with Texas

no matter,

IT'S TIME

CLAW

ANTLERS

GINGER ALE

it's time

because I've already moved on...

seriously? no. I'm still so pissed I could spit that Rick "Butterfly Kisses" Carlisle screwed up the Mavericks' playoff hopes by leaving our most valuable weapon (Roddy B.) on the bench for most of the series....

but when I look at Zach Galifianakis and Tony Romo laughing together I can't help but feel that all is right in the world. at least for that moment.

gaze upon the glory

first things first- Paul Lukas over at Uni-Watch totally rocked my world, again, by revealing the Brad Childress has a hearing imparement!!!?! I. feel. like. a. horse's. pa. toot. (you'll see why later) also who knew that Brad Childress and Flozell Adams had/have ANYTHING in common? surprise, surprise, surprise... here are some random conference championship/Super Bowl thoughts I had (and tweeted)
-Mark Sanchez shaved his playoff stubble (off ) and wore an undershirt to his post game press conference. that makes him the second best dressed starting quarterback in Sunday's post game pressers. Sanchez is behind Peyton Manning who wore a suit and looked like he was serious (but it's just a game!) meanwhile Brett Farve looked like a old dead body that had been propped up behind a few microphones (he's second worst dressed) and Dree Brews wore that stupid Newsies hat that Tony Romo can't seem to get away from (can escape almost any rushing defender but can't get away from that damn hat) so Brews, step it up for the Super Bowl

-Gary Brackett does not look like a football player, he will be a very successful R&B producer when he stops faking football.

-Sunday = National French League football because, presumedly, the only two Pierre's in the league won their games (Pierre Garcon of Indy and Pierre Thomas of N.O.)

-every time Farve says that he's going to "talk" with his family his entire family rolls their eyes. they hate him more than I do

-did you know the NBA scheduled games during the NFL's conference championship games? idiots. so you missed the Mavs 50 point demolishing of the New York Knocks, otherwise known as the Knocks worst home loss (at the Garden) ever! but seriously, why is the Garden such a big deal? who cares!

-Pam Oliver tried to make Reggie Bush cry when she interviewed him after the game "are you going to be alright?" bitch, please!

-believe it or not both Matt Lineheart and Reggie Bush have made it to a Super Bowl, ridiculous. neither got their the way we might have thought they would (at least, the way we thought they would before they played Vince Young in the Rose Bowl. speaking of Young, he's going to the Pro Bowl for being the only quarterback in the AFC that didn't say "no, I don't wanna play in that joke of a game!")

-when it's all said and done the Saints will have played 3 straight games against 3 Hall of Fame quarterbacks, pretty remarkable (he remarked)

-Manning's heading back to the site of his first Super Bowl (let's pray for no rain this time) and Brews is finally going to the city he should have landed in as a free agent

-last time both #1 seeds made it to the Super Bowl? 1993, Dallas vs. Buffalo

-between Favre's interceptions and Peterson's fumbles you had to know they couldn't win the Super Bowl and you can't be surprised that they didn't even make it that far

-Childress actually wore a Motorola headset! probably bought it at a mall kiosk

-can Brett Farve finally retire to Valhalla?

NFL Conf. Championship match ups (mascot style)

I can't see how The Saint(s)
could beat the vikings but stupider things have happened

and the Jets have an obvious advantage over the

colt but thankfully the mascots will be off the field of play and the Vikes will beat the Saints and the Colts will beat the Jets. am I right?

am I bitterly defending a trade that I really don't care one way or the other about?

probably. but ever since the Harris-Kidd trade all we've heard here in Big D is how Kidd's past his prime and the NBA belongs to the young point guards however I can't seem to find one example of a clutch young PG, especially a clutch playoff young PG. top PGs no longer in this post season?

Chris Paul

Deron Williams

Steve Nash

Jose Calderon

Baron Davis

Chris Duhon

Devin Harris

Tony Parker

Raymond Felton

Andre Miller

(these are ten of the top fifteen PGs in the league that aren't competing for a championship, also out of those ten only one has won any championships. so would Utah or New Orleans rather have a championship or their All-Star point guards?)

here's your reward for reading so many "PGs"

clutch is a funny word if you type it enough times

dictionary.com sucks, 82games.com doesn't. I think I'm gonna go with their measure of clutch which has in it's top ten-

Kobe
Lebron
Carmelo
D-Wade
Chris Paul
Nate Robinson
Roy
Dirk
Pierce
Randolph

how/why? "4th quarter or overtime, less than 5 minutes left, neither team ahead by more than 5 points" and I'll buy that as a pretty good description of clutch time

if we're comparing the Mavs and Nugs, Mavs are more clutch because Dirk and Terry appear many spots ahead of Denver's second most clutch player- Chauncey

what does all of this mean? are the Mavs "due?" I have no idea

GO MAVS

Jalen Rose has gotten way too much attention for a former player/now broadcaster. media shouldn't be the news. that being said, did y'all hear his response to Jeff Van Gundy's comments that the last four minutes of a game should be officiated differently than the rest of the game (referencing the Rondo/Miller slap in last nights Celts/Bulls game 5)

Rose said the end of the game should be officiated the same as the beginning. couldn't agree more. if the league's gonna jump on Dwight Howard for his killer elbow then they better slap Rondo with a heavy penalty too

Dirk a choke artist?

listening to Newy & Salisbury on 105.3 The Fan I heard a lot of fans complaining that Dirk is terrible in the playoffs, a choke artist and saying that we'd never win with him. I get defensive.
I've heard enough about Kobe & Lebron.
Lebron's won as many championships as Dirk has. zero. Kobe was on a three time championship team. kinda like how Ben R. has been on two Super Bowl winning teams (not going to go down that rabbit trail) but to claim that Dirk isn't clutch demands we say who is, the easiest way to determine this is to say that only the winning team has a clutch player, if you don't win then you aren't clutch.

clutch-
over the past ten years we've had five winning teams.
Spurs
Lakers
Detroit
Miami
Boston
who's been clutch on the Spurs? Tim Duncan.
who was clutch on the Lakers? Shaq.
Detroit? the team (you'll notice with that line up they won only one championship and separately have won no more)
Miami? the officials. I mean, Wade.
Boston? Paul Pierce.

that's-
Tim Duncan
Shaq
Wade
Pierce.

that's it. those are the only guys playing in the NBA today that can claim to be "clutch" or better than Dirk. anybody that says otherwise needs to get their head checked and YES, obviously no one would take current Tim Duncan, Shaq or Pierce over Dirk. Dirk's playoff average of 25 and 10 puts him in an elite group of playoff competitors. Dirk is a good post season player, not a champ (obvi)

Hornets get punked by 58

above: true fans?

meanwhile 2008 Mavericks rejoice, 2009 Mavericks cringe. go fig

it has to be said-