RIP Coach Joe (Avezzano)

I had wings for lunch and

Marion Barber retired. #winning

in memoriam

Remember when the Boys were like, good and stuff?

Then...



and Now...

RIP

the Cowboys are finished. bury them. leave a cellphone in the coffin but bury them.

a few suggestions for this second, even worse half of the 2010 season-

feed Romo steroids. do it openly, let the league and media know about it. he'll get a four game suspension that won't matter because he was already going to miss 8-10 because of his injury. hopefully with the help of the steroids he'll be healthy after four weeks and will come back early from the injury/everyone will learn something about steroids (talking to you, stupid media)

also, while Romo is serving his four game suspension I believe the Cowboys need to hire Jeff Garcia. the man can play and would make us better than okay during Romo's four game steroid suspension.

IJS

RANGERS WIN!

if you don't understand why this is a big deal then read this

there's no denying that this is a football town, heck the metroplex and much of this state/region find their sports identity with the Dallas Cowboys. I can't help but believe that this is partly due to the fact that the Cowboys are winners (I know, they haven't won in a while....) meanwhile the professional teams that came to Dallas after the 'Boys have all been sometimes lovable always losers. the Rangers have been the kings of loserdom as the Stars (the latest pro squad to call Dallas home) won a championship just a few short years after settling into the metroplex. the Mavs haven't won a championship but they've had great regular season success and they have gone deep into the playoffs. winning covers losing. the Cowboys have won 5 Super Bowls although they haven't won since the mid-90s they're still "winners" in most of our minds, same goes for the Stars although they haven't been a contender in over a decade that single championship means everything. the Mavs, never champions, have won just enough to be in our good graces. the Rangers hadn't won a thing, until last night. the Rangers had always been there for us when we needed to go to a pro game but didn't want to spend a lotta money. they were there when the first sport we played was baseball and they were there when we needed a ball cap (I love my Cowboys hat but baseball is the only sport that has an article of clothing, a piece of their game day uniform, that can be worn by a regular Joe and Joe not be considered white trash. am I right?) the Rangers are finally "there" in mid-October and it feels wonderful, like a Canada Dry shower

Hambone doesn't do alcohol showers so his teammates shook up plastic bottles of ginger ale and showered the lockerroom with sweet, sweet airplane refreshing goodness. as someone tweeted last night "now that's a team"

the journey isn't over yet but let's acknowledge all of the teams in Rangers past (by way of logo) starting with the AL West champion, antler and claw throwin', 2010 Texas Rangers. ALCS HERE WE COME!

it's time.

meow!

The 2010 Wolfpack Fantasy Football League

this past Saturday things got real real. I met PJ for the first time and still prefer a man named Paul. Ryan was LIVE and in attendance. Ross drafted Joe Flacco.

I'm going to share my starters and hope the other guyz share theirs with you because I want you to make fun of them for being so stupid. I'm serious

QB Aaron Rodgers

RB Adrian Peterson (Vikings)
RB Steven Jackson

WR Michael Crabtree (I believe)
WR Chad Ochocinco
WR Percy Harvin (reach?)

TE Chris(ty) Cooley

K Stephen Gostkowski

DEF Dallas Cowboys

so there's no way you hate that team unless you don't like people named Steven/Stephen

really awkward SportingNews cover

Roy Williams should carry Dez's shoulder pads

does anyone like Roy Williams? has Roy Williams ever done anything good for the team? is Roy Williams the closest thing to a cancer in the locker room that the Cowboys have? furthermore is the media blowing this way outta proportion writing stories saying "Dez shoulda carried Roy's pads" and "Dez is a diva" I'd say things must be pretty quiet for this to get the coverage, national even, that it has. go Dez, glad to finally have a WR named Bryant that isn't crazy (I'm lookin' at you, Antonio)

sexy

Encouraging Cowboys Info

I might be a little late on this, but here's an interesting Cowboys uni tidbit from Richie Whitt.

Got Kickz?

Cowboys Rookie WR Dez Bryant approaches the ball at full-speed and shirtless durning field goal drills at the Cowboys latest OTA

Can Dez Bryant kick? Because the Cowboys don't have a kicker right now and this Cowboys fan is getting nervous. Ferris Buehler kicks like a sawed-off shotgun (powerful and all over the place), so I don't think he's the answer.

because I've already moved on...

seriously? no. I'm still so pissed I could spit that Rick "Butterfly Kisses" Carlisle screwed up the Mavericks' playoff hopes by leaving our most valuable weapon (Roddy B.) on the bench for most of the series....

but when I look at Zach Galifianakis and Tony Romo laughing together I can't help but feel that all is right in the world. at least for that moment.

FOLLOW @THEYREMAMMALS 2010 NFL DRAFT LIVE TWEETING

did I say that right? what I'm tryin' to say is that we're going to tweet the hell outta the first round of the NFL draft tonight so you'd better go to www.twitter.com/theyremammals and follow us or become our friend so that we can trade hilarious observations while Jimmy Clausen waits.

Jerry go rehab?

something's telling me "nooo, nooo, nooo" bust still how does he spin this? wouldn't an alcohol problem be easier than "I used that shit Parcells to trick Arlington into building my monument. oh, by the way Tebow can suck my...



most important part of this video- what bar in Dallas has televisions for sports watching and beautiful live piano music for your listening pleasure?? I want to go to there.

Sports so much talk

so I'm a little down after I couldn't find an embeddable copy of the video of Mark Cuban seemingly fighting an official at a Mavs game (it was an April Fools joke that has to be the number one April Fools joke of all sports time)

but the Cows did release two expensive old dudes (which I'm told was a good move) and the Eagles traded away their "Brett Favre" so I can't be too upset. well, the 'Skins did just get the best QB they've had in ever. so the NFL season is light years away and baseball just started, I kinda understand why Ron did cocaine...

maybe Faith Hill is not such a bad singer after all

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DALLAS COWBOYS!!!

in honor of this glorious occasion I'm bringing you a photo list (alphabetical) of the men who have started at the quarterback position for the Dallas Cowboys over the past 50 years. there are a few men that are not represented here because their picture apparently does not exist on the internet (so they really don't deserve to be on the list anyway) here you will find Super Bowl winners and losers that never should have worn the star on their helmet... in making this list it reminded me of James Bond. when you think of James Bond only a few (or one) actors come to mind, I think the same can be said of the quarterback position for the Dallas Cowboys- Dandy Don, Roger The Dodger, Danny White, Troy Aikman and Tony Romo- America's Men

anybody interested in some heavier than metal?

gotta be honest, Columbo and Davis (sometimes Procter) could have come up with a better album cover... looks like a fake rock album cover from a movie starring Shai Labeouf GO COWBOYS!

gaze upon the glory

first things first- Paul Lukas over at Uni-Watch totally rocked my world, again, by revealing the Brad Childress has a hearing imparement!!!?! I. feel. like. a. horse's. pa. toot. (you'll see why later) also who knew that Brad Childress and Flozell Adams had/have ANYTHING in common? surprise, surprise, surprise... here are some random conference championship/Super Bowl thoughts I had (and tweeted)
-Mark Sanchez shaved his playoff stubble (off ) and wore an undershirt to his post game press conference. that makes him the second best dressed starting quarterback in Sunday's post game pressers. Sanchez is behind Peyton Manning who wore a suit and looked like he was serious (but it's just a game!) meanwhile Brett Farve looked like a old dead body that had been propped up behind a few microphones (he's second worst dressed) and Dree Brews wore that stupid Newsies hat that Tony Romo can't seem to get away from (can escape almost any rushing defender but can't get away from that damn hat) so Brews, step it up for the Super Bowl

-Gary Brackett does not look like a football player, he will be a very successful R&B producer when he stops faking football.

-Sunday = National French League football because, presumedly, the only two Pierre's in the league won their games (Pierre Garcon of Indy and Pierre Thomas of N.O.)

-every time Farve says that he's going to "talk" with his family his entire family rolls their eyes. they hate him more than I do

-did you know the NBA scheduled games during the NFL's conference championship games? idiots. so you missed the Mavs 50 point demolishing of the New York Knocks, otherwise known as the Knocks worst home loss (at the Garden) ever! but seriously, why is the Garden such a big deal? who cares!

-Pam Oliver tried to make Reggie Bush cry when she interviewed him after the game "are you going to be alright?" bitch, please!

-believe it or not both Matt Lineheart and Reggie Bush have made it to a Super Bowl, ridiculous. neither got their the way we might have thought they would (at least, the way we thought they would before they played Vince Young in the Rose Bowl. speaking of Young, he's going to the Pro Bowl for being the only quarterback in the AFC that didn't say "no, I don't wanna play in that joke of a game!")

-when it's all said and done the Saints will have played 3 straight games against 3 Hall of Fame quarterbacks, pretty remarkable (he remarked)

-Manning's heading back to the site of his first Super Bowl (let's pray for no rain this time) and Brews is finally going to the city he should have landed in as a free agent

-last time both #1 seeds made it to the Super Bowl? 1993, Dallas vs. Buffalo

-between Favre's interceptions and Peterson's fumbles you had to know they couldn't win the Super Bowl and you can't be surprised that they didn't even make it that far

-Childress actually wore a Motorola headset! probably bought it at a mall kiosk

-can Brett Farve finally retire to Valhalla?